7 Effective Coping Strategies for Highly Sensitive People
Though there are many benefits to being a highly sensitive person (HSP), it can also come with a few downsides. We can become exhausted and overwhelmed easily, and when HSPs feel overwhelmed, it can be harder to function in a way that makes us feel good. This is especially true when we have strong emotional reactions to the stressors in our lives and when life gets difficult (and gosh, does it ever).
Perhaps you’re an HSP who is struggling with feeling:
trapped in a job you can’t stand
uncomfortable setting boundaries
dissatisfied with how you look and feel
frustrated when your efforts aren’t bearing fruit
worried you aren’t serving your purpose in life
scared to end a relationship that no longer serves you
building self-confidence after being negatively judged
The challenges that overwhelm HSPs look different for each of us. No matter what you’re struggling with, however, you can use these coping strategies for HSPs to keep yourself on the right track.
1. Improve Your Self-Awareness
If you want to cope better with the stressors in your life, some HSPs need to first focus on improving self-awareness. When you know yourself deeply, it becomes easier to navigate a wider range of challenges more effectively because your thoughts and actions will stem from a greater sense of self.
Here are some ideas for how to improve your self-awareness as an HSP:
Read The Highly Sensitive Person. If you haven’t read it already, The Highly Sensitive Person by Dr. Elaine Aron is filled with tons of incredible tips for understanding your sensitive nature. Written with a supportive and celebratory tone, this book is a powerful tool for any HSP seeking a deeper sense of self.
Keep a journal to record intense reactions or feelings. When you pay close attention how you feel and react to different scenarios, then you’re able to recognize your emotional patterns and make healthier coping decisions moving forward. For example, you might decide to limit time you spend with a friend who makes you feel emotionally drained.
Get honest about your strengths and weaknesses. Write down everything that comes to mind about what do well and not so well. Review this list often to remind yourself not only how awesome you are but also where you’d like to improve.
Pay attention to how others respond to you. Use the reactions of your family members, friends, and coworkers to gather clues about how well you come across to others. When you are more aware of how others perceive your words and behaviors, you can use that feedback to build stronger relationships moving forward.
2. Set Better Boundaries
Setting strong boundaries helps you maintain healthy relationships, preserve your emotional well-being, and foster a deeper sense of self-respect. It also helps you strike a delicate balance between giving and receiving in relationships that, when done well, can prevent you from overextending yourself or becoming overly dependent on others’ validation and support.
Without boundaries, you may feel taken advantage of or resentful toward others who consistently overstep your limitations. Here are a few ways you can practice setting boundaries:
Identify what your needs are. To clearly communicate your needs and set stronger boundaries, you first need to understand what your boundaries look like. Consider what behaviors or actions are acceptable and unacceptable to you. These are typically limitations surrounding your time, energy, and resources.
Be clear and specific. No one can read your mind, so it’s up to you to communicate what works for you and what doesn’t. For example, say you are frustrated with a manager who consistently rushes you. To set a clear and specific boundary, you might say something like, “I would love to submit this by the deadline you’ve given, but I don’t work well when I’m rushing. Moving forward, please give me at least three days for each of these assignments so I can give you my best possible work.”
Be consistent. Uphold your boundaries by kindly but firmly reminding others how to meet your needs, especially when they try to pressure or manipulate you into caving. After time, people will learn how you prefer to be treated. If they continue crossing your lines, it may be time to question whether you want them in your life or need to limit your interactions with them.
Respect the boundaries of others. Setting and respecting boundaries is a two-way street. When you respect the way others prefer to be treated, not only are you practicing what you preach, but you’re modeling the behavior for others. It sets a good example and inspires others to do the same.
Setting boundaries can requires lots of practice and adjustment over time — especially for HSPs, who are highly empathetic. Be patient with yourself and celebrate your progress as you prioritize your well-being in this way.
3. Practice Mindfulness and Meditation
Mindfulness and meditation are important practices for HSPs that can reduce stress, improve mental clarity, and help regulate your emotions in a healthier way. This practice can also help you live more “in the moment,” which studies show can increase your happiness and sense of well-being.
Here are some steps to get started:
Find a quiet and comfortable space where you can sit or lie down without distractions.
Close your eyes or find a soft gaze, and gently relax your body, starting at your head and moving through each part of your body, down to your toes.
Direct your attention to the sensation of your breath as it enters and exits your body. Notice the rise and fall of your chest or the feeling of air passing through your nostrils.
Allow your thoughts, emotions, and any other sensations arise without judgment. Notice them as they come and go and return to your breath whenever you get distracted.
Continuously bring your attention back to the present moment whenever your mind wanders.
Aim to practice mindfulness and meditation for a few minutes each day, gradually increasing the duration as you become more comfortable. Record how it makes you feel and in what ways you see improvements so you can track your progress and land on a routine that works for you.
4. Build Healthier Habits
HSPs are more susceptible to stress and overwhelm, which is why building healthier habits — such as getting regular exercise and adequate sleep — can help HSPs manage stress more effectively and maintain and emotional balance. Over time, this can also help increase productivity and prevent burnout.
You can build a healthier lifestyle by making sustainable changes to various aspects of your life, including your diet, exercise, sleep, stress management, and self-care. Here’s how:
Set realistic goals. Start by identifying specific, achievable goals that align with your priorities and meet you where you are. If you are trying to eat healthier and increase your step count, don’t expect yourself to go from a terrible diet to vegan, low carb, and gluten free while also going from 2,000 steps per day to over 10,000. This mentality will likely cause you to fail. Break larger goals into smaller, more manageable steps that are slightly better than where you are now and build on this over time. This way, it’s not too much change at once and you’re more likely to stick with it.
Be consistent over time. According to Scientific American, forming habits can take an average of sixty-six days. Don’t beat yourself up if things are sticking and give yourself plenty of time. The most important thing is showing up consistently.
Allow yourself lots of grace. Allow yourself plenty of grace as you try new things. Add new habits one at a time and give yourself plenty of room between to experiment and adjust. Building healthier habits takes time!
5. Reduce Your Stress
Managing stress is essential for your overall health and well-being. Studies reveal that chronic stress can have a significant impact on your physical and mental health, such as cardiovascular disease, weakened immune function, anxiety, depression, and sleep disturbances.
Here’s what you can try:
Practice deep-breathing exercises. Incorporate deep-breathing exercises into your daily routine to activate the body’s relaxation response. Inhale deeply through your nose for five seconds, and exhale slowly through your mouth for seven, focusing on exhaling more slowly that you inhale.
Engage in progressive muscle relaxation. Practice progressive muscle relaxation by tensing and relaxing different muscle groups in your body. Start with your toes and work your way up to your head, focusing on building and releasing tension.
Seek social support. Seek support from trustworthy friends, family members, or professionals, such as your therapist or coach, when you’re feeling stressed. By sharing your feelings with others, you allow them to provide comfort, validation, and a fresh perspective on your situation that can be extremely cathartic.
6. Schedule Plenty of Downtime
Scheduling lots of downtime is important for HSPs. We need adequate time to recharge our emotional and social batteries so our nervous systems can recover. If we ignore this need on an ongoing basis, we increase the chances of exhaustion and burnout, which can make it more difficult to cope with the stressors in our lives.
On the flip side, when HSPs make time to recover, we can experience:
more creativity and imagination
better emotional balance and wellbeing
enhanced resilience and emotional adaptability
Here are some practical tips for scheduling more downtime in your day:
Block off time in your calendar. Maybe you want to block people from making appointments until 11 am so you can have a distraction-free morning, or perhaps you need a reminder to read before bed. Make these moments non-negotiable and block them out on your calendar to remind you of their importance.
Limit screen time. Reducing exposure to screens and digital devices during your downtime will help minimize sensory stimulation and promote a better sense of relaxation. Try engaging in screen-free activities, such as spending time outdoors or journaling.
Commit to better time management. Managing your time effectively can help make room for more downtime in your schedule. Take a moment to prioritize your tasks, delegate responsibilities when possible, and avoid procrastinating so you can create more space for relaxation and self-care.
Practice saying “no.” Learn to say no to activities, commitments, or requests that take away from your downtime. Prioritize activities that fill your energy, such as listening to music or taking a bath.
7. Find a Creative Outlet
HSPs are known to have strong creative abilities and rich inner worlds. When you find a creative outlet you enjoy — such as woodworking, needlepoint, or dance — you can express strong emotions in a healthy, constructive way.
Creative outlets can also help HSPs:
feel calmer and more peaceful
achieve a deeper state of flow
foster self-discovery and introspection
discover a more meaningful sense of purpose
build a stronger sense of confidence
improve mental and emotional health
Here’s how to find your creative outlet:
Experiment with different mediums. Explore a variety of artistic mediums, such as painting, drawing, writing, music, photography, or crafting to discover what resonates with you. Allow yourself to experiment without judgment or the pressure to be perfect, and see which mediums feel most natural and fulfilling.
Reflect on your interests. Consider your passions, interests, and talents as a starting point for creative expression. What activities bring you joy, inspiration, or a sense of flow? Use these interests as a springboard for exploring creative outlets that align with your preferences.
Start small. Begin with simple, manageable creative projects to build confidence and momentum. Set aside time each day or week to engage in creative activities, even if it’s just for a few minutes. Consistency is key to nurturing your creativity over time.
Join a creative community. Seek out opportunities to connect with other creatives and join supportive communities or workshops where you can share ideas, receive feedback, and collaborate on projects. Building relationships with like-minded individuals can inspire and motivate your creative endeavors.
Discover Which Coping Strategies for HSPs Work for You
Coping strategies that work for some HSPs may not work as well for others, so don’t put too much pressure on yourself to figure everything out at once. Give yourself lots of grace as you try different approaches — and allow yourself room to experiment and make mistakes (aka learning opportunities).
If you’d like to explore these options with a life or career coach, set up a free discovery session with Happy HSP Coaching. We can discuss your specific challenges and create a gameplan that will help you build the happy, healthy life you want and deserve.